By admin 
Dating coach Mel Schilling became a familiar face to reality TV fans around the world as an expert on Married At First Sight (MAFS), a show she worked on for 12 seasons across two countries.
Consequently, the announcement of her death today (March 24) after her cancer diagnosis has devastated fans and showbiz colleagues alike, with fellow MAFS Australia expert John Aiken sharing that ‘it’s not fair that my partner in crime is gone,’ and saying ‘she was one of the good ones’.
The 54-year-old Australian-born former psychologist was diagnosed with bowel cancer in 2023, after some major red flag health symptoms were overlooked by medical professionals who said she was probably constipated, or just tired.
But after she flew back to the UK after the MAFS series ended, Schilling’s doctor sent her for a scan.
Mel Schilling was forced to pull out of the last season of Married at First Sight Australia due to her deteriorating health (John Clark/BAFTA via Getty Images)
This identified a tumor in her bowel that she called ‘Terry’, which was surgically removed, but in February 2024 a routine scan found nodules in her lungs, which meant the cancer had metastasized.
Early detection is absolutely key for cancer patients, even more so for bowel cancer, as 90 percent of cases caught early are extremely treatable, according to Guts UK. However, Schilling’s red flag symptoms were overlooked twice by doctors.
Stomach cramps
Mel Schilling launched the ‘How to Date’ podcast with co-host Elizabeth Day at an event in London last year (Ben Montgomery/Getty Images)
Part of Schilling’s issue was that she did not present with one of the most common and obvious symptoms of the cancer, which is finding blood in your stool. Instead, the dating expert was riddled with severe stomach cramps for months.
At first, like many women would, she thought this could just be a particularly painful side effect of her period, while a doctor she spoke to about the issue suggested that it could just be constipation.
She told Australian broadcaster ABC back in 2023: “I was filming in Australia I developed severe stomach cramps on set, I put it down to all the travel I’d been doing and the upset it caused to my system.
“I saw my GP in Sydney and he put it down to constipation, gave me some laxatives and sent me on my way.
“Fortunately I knew something still wasn’t right so I booked in for a scan when I returned to the UK.”
On another occasion, Schilling explained to the Mirror: “They told me that it was nothing, and suggested that I was just constipated or I was tired.
“I think we really need to raise awareness for not just individuals, but also for medical professionals to be aware that there are very, very, simple tests to diagnose bowel cancer.”
‘Blinding headaches’ and numbness
She shared an updated earlier this month, explaining her cancer had spread (Instagram/@mel_schilling1)
While the TV personality had, at first, dismissed her cramps as being a normal part of life, this natural human tendency to hope for the best outcome also meant that another warning sign that something was going wrong went overlooked.
With the tumor in her bowel removed and doctors talking about nodules in her lungs, Schilling was not thinking about brain cancer when she started suffering ‘blinding headaches’ and a numbness on one side of her body.
She explained in March as she revealed her shock terminal diagnosis: “Over Christmas, however, I began experiencing blinding headaches and numbness down my right side.
“After many tests I was told the cancer had spread to the left side of my brain and, despite subsequent radiotherapy sessions, my oncology team have now told me there is nothing further they can do.”
Numbness and tingling are some of the most common early signs of brain cancer, which is rarely diagnosed in its earliest stages, as the symptoms are often confused with something else.
Mel Schilling’s husband’s emotional tribute in full
He wrote: “Melanie Jane Brisbane-Schilling passed away peacefully today, surrounded by love.
“In her final moments, when I thought cancer had taken away her ability to speak, she ushered me closer and whispered a message for Maddie and me that will sustain me for the rest of my life. It took all of her remaining strength, and that gesture summed up our wee Melsie perfectly. Even then, her only thought was for Maddie and me.
“This is a woman who became a new mum and a TV star at 42 — and nailed both.
“This is a woman who, through two years of chemotherapy, when she could barely lift her head from the pillow, never complained and never stopped showing courage, grace, compassion and empathy, and never missed a day of filming.
“To most of you, she was Mel Schilling — matriarch of MAFS and queen of reality TV. To Maddie and me, she was our wee Melsie: an incredible mum, role model, and soulmate.
“On behalf of our family and her incredible friendship group, thank you for the support from around the world.
“I also want to thank our wonderful MAFS family — John, Alessandra, Charlene, Roxy, and Sophie — for your kindness and compassion.
“To Lee, Louie, Susy, and Ian at Channel 4 / CPL, who went above and beyond for us, we will never forget it.
“To Sarah at InterTalent, not just an agent, but a true confidante.
“And to the wonderful Elizabeth Day — Mel’s podcasting partner and dear friend — thank you for your friendship and empathy.
“Life can be beautiful, and life can be incredibly cruel. But ultimately, life is fleeting, fragile, and tomorrow is promised to no one. If you can do anything to honour Mel, please live life to the full, love your people well, and try not to sweat the small stuff.
“I had 15 wonderful years with my soulmate, and it was the privilege of my life to be by her side. For that, I will be forever thankful.
“Goodbye, my love. My one. Until we meet again.”
Married at First Sight’s tribute
“Mel was a wonderful colleague and friend. She had a gift for connecting with people and helping them navigate life’s challenges. For years, she guided us through the complexities of the human heart with wisdom, honesty, and kindness.
“Mel was a big part of our family, and she will be greatly missed. Our hearts and deepest sympathies are with her husband Gareth, their daughter Maddie and her entire family during this incredibly difficult time.”
If you’ve been affected by any of these issues and want to speak to someone in confidence, contact the American Cancer Society on 1-800-227-2345 or via their live chat feature, available 24/7 every day of the year.